im not funny

obamallamatime:

Hello, Police? I accidentally stepped on my cats foot and need to be arrested

bitchytbh:

having “feelings” is ruining my reputation of being a heartless bitch 

sanitaryum:

The Captain America/Puerto Rico pic  AND Marvel’s majestic response

buckyoubucky:

"A new study shows that men are threatened by confident women taking pictures of themselves, and call these women stupid, socially inept, and ugly. In other news, the world is round, the sky is blue, and the patriarchy is still shitty."

buckyoubucky:

"A new study shows that men are threatened by confident women taking pictures of themselves, and call these women stupid, socially inept, and ugly. In other news, the world is round, the sky is blue, and the patriarchy is still shitty."

thekingofwinter:

takohai:

glitteringknight:

"Your highness" is gender neutral.

So you know, if you’re ever confused about my pronouns.

That’ll work.

alternatively, “your majesty,” “my liege,” and “supreme overlord”

please note that “your grace” is also acceptable

neilnevins:

theladylillibet:

catsidae:

Some things that should be acceptable by now:

  • Girls having sleepovers with boys.
  • Female nipples showing.
  • Marriage equality and equality in general.
  • Doing what you want with your body.
  • Wearing what you want,
  • Kinder eggs in America.

For a second I thought you meant eggs should be nicer to people

well they should anyway

turdqu0ize:

keep fuckin walkin you postman piece of shit

turdqu0ize:

keep fuckin walkin you postman piece of shit

slayboybunny:

"sir what you did is literally 100 percent illegal"
"ok but get this: im a rich white person" 
"oh sorry about that sir" 

almightykushlord:

Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

svaggity-svat-i-can-do-zat:

THIS IS THE ONE GIF SET I HAVE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE FOR

nico-diangelcakes:

nico-diangelcakes:

So i have this giant pencil right

image

I think we all know where this is going.

image

the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming

fucksebastianstan:

basedpidgeot:

feather-in-my-cap-and-cheese:

urbendisaster:

what?

The wheels take impact and stress off your legs, and the position helps your spine, but you’re still doing running motions instead of biking motions, so your legs are getting a good workout, and you can go for longer

nerdy shit aside, iamgine how sick it must be to just let those feet fly into the air and do superman poses down a highway

"Nerdy shit aside u can act like Superman"

fucksebastianstan:

basedpidgeot:

feather-in-my-cap-and-cheese:

urbendisaster:

what?

The wheels take impact and stress off your legs, and the position helps your spine, but you’re still doing running motions instead of biking motions, so your legs are getting a good workout, and you can go for longer

nerdy shit aside, iamgine how sick it must be to just let those feet fly into the air and do superman poses down a highway

"Nerdy shit aside u can act like Superman"